MAKE THE GIRL DANCE

I'll just leave this here...



-Brien

FAIL

Sauce: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kn30slt_7-0

-Brien

IMPORTANT NEWS!!!

Hey I know it's been a while since we posted anything but I just couldn't let this one slide. Recently Joe Trohman of Fall Out Boy fame sat down for a chat with Ultimate-Guitar.com's Brandon Weiss. In the controversial interview he revealed astonishing secrets and details about the band's current album and supporting tour. When asked bout the various aspects of the band's rise from pop-punk indie band to rock star juggernauts, he had this to say:

"I actually used to have long hair before people cared about Fall Out Boy. It was really long, about this long. You know how as you grow older the texture of your hair changes? My hair used to be like the longer it wouldn’t weight down, it would just go out. Now it weighs down. I think it has to do with me getting older and my hair texture just completely changing. It was weird. Our fans kept bugging me to grow my hair back out and I was like “um yeah, sure, why not?” I started doing it. It is cool for playing live. I’ve always noticed that dudes that have long hair when they’re headbanging it looks like they’re rocking out harder than they really are. I know that’s the visual trickery of it. Of course all the cool, classic rock guitar players had long hair which made them look awesome. I like it. My hair is so thick and unmanageable that it really gets in the way sometimes of not just eating, but seeing too. Especially on stage it can be a difficult thing to do. I’m still learning how to balance enjoying my hair length and being able to see and play on stage."



Ultimate-Guitar.com. Important shit.

-Brien

108

Take two deep breaths

Count down slowly

The girls won't turn their noses up at you

The jocks will put on weight and lose their appeal

The bad teachers will fade from memory

Backstabbing ex's will miss your smile

The "freaks" will realize that their originality is a facade

One breath

Good people emerge in view

Girls who laughed at your jokes

Guys who called just to chill

Teachers who taught you how to think

And also how to write

Family that gave you morals

And challenged you to debate

One day you'll rise above all of this

Make your money having your say

So relax for now

This won't hurt a bit.

~Andy

JONAS BROTHERS FAIL

Thank you, Failblog.


VS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGqzbUsqFxY

-Brien

Unpublished.

Maybe it's because I don't know the right people.
Maybe it's because my favorite writers aren't scholars with years of schooling in literary craft, but sweaty, hairy men on a stage, slapping a bass or pounding a cowbell.
Maybe it's because poetry to me isn't a painting, but a photograph.
Maybe it's because I'm a photographer who hasn't discovered Photoshop.
Maybe it's spite. Envious spite.
Maybe it's the language; maybe it's too thick and obscure.
Maybe it's the hours spent clicking buttons and gazing at back-lit screens instead of pouring over the sacred scriptures.
Burning my precious time away
like a cigarette on an ashtray.
Maybe it's trite similes like that.
Maybe it's because I don't care enough.
Maybe I'm just delusional.
Maybe it's because it's not my time.
Or maybe, just maybe, it's because I suck.

-Brien

MY GOD THE WALLS!

How many times has this happened to you? You buy a million dollar home in sunny Florida, and then inexplicably get headaches and bloody noses. You're rich! You should never have to deal with common ailments! Of course, you do the first thing that makes sense, you blame it on the Chinese drywall...

Alright alright, so it seems as if the drywall plague has some merit, and it has been making them sick. But does this REALLY need to be on the front page of CNN? From sensationalizing the H1N1 virus to telling you your walls are going to kill you, CNN's got panic on their side. I mean, look at the story, it was on the front page. Nevermind insinuations that cops in Texas are shaking down pulled over motorists, or the fact that guns and body armor were found in a day care, we need to hear about the millionaires with homes are making them sick.

The picture is what really made me laugh, there are still thousands of homeless people in New Orleans and across America, and here are two women hugging and consoling each other in their designer label outfits and apparently marble lined kitchen. At first I thought it was just a misprint but CNN is actually expecting me to feel sorry for them. Though this story is interesting, it doesn't deserve the front page.

Yes yes I know I ranted a bit, I'm sorry for that but I'm tired of our media. Also I laughed because this story reminded me of that Aaahh Real Monsters! episode where the students are sent to a haunted house to get a scare.

I would have posted a clip but they're nowhere to be found on the internet, so I apologize that this post isn't as amusing as I had intended.

~Andy